I’m no expert, but I have experienced things in my life that have shattered my confidence and left me to rebuild a sense of belonging and trust in myself. After struggling with bullying, an eating disorder, anxiety and a sense of lost identity, I believe that I know a thing or too about how to regain your confidence and building yourself into someone who glows with life, emits happy and positive vibes and overall doesn’t give a sh*t what people think about them. It can be the hardest thing to want that sense of belonging and positivity and not be able to gain those things. It can also be the hardest thing to recover from a sense of worthlessness and self loathing. But here I am, showing you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to keep pushing forward to get to where you want to be in life.
I am now one of the most curious an least self conscious people that I have ever come across, build yourself up, step by step into the person you want to be. The journey will be worth it ♥︎
Here you can find some of the tips and tricks I use frequently to help build and maintain my self confidence/esteem. I hope you find them helpful too!
1. Find a purpose or a passion
Focus your energy onto something you feel certain about and confident doing and that positivity will flow into every aspect of your life. This could be a passion that you have, something that gives you purpose or something that brings out your creative curiosities. Just follow your heart. If it makes you feel excited, happy, that makes the cogs in your brain start to turn, lights a fire in your heart or just generally brings out a curiosity follow that feeling and explore what it has to offer. If you don’t follow that positive influence you never know what type of potential your confident and self could have reached.
These things may drive you to pursue further goals, increase your determination and give you a sense of purpose and belonging, which might also increase your confidence too!
2. Smile and laugh more
Smiling is contagious, at least for me it is. If someone around me is giving off positive, happy vibes chances are I’m going to catch the vibe and I’m going to start smiling too. Smiling stimulates the releases of endorphins which reduce and also decrease stress, thats why even when you’re faking a smile you start to feel a sense of happiness and feel good vibe.
3. Remove Boundaries
In life we tend to set up too many boundaries for ourselves. We build walls and draw lines that we’re not allowed to cross because we’re scared of failure, pain and embarrassment. Dare to do things a bit differently even if its only one small thing every once in a while. Let your courage come out to play and do something you’re not necessarily comfortable doing. You’ll only really ever regret the things you didn’t do, so take the leap of faith and take a chance.
4. Let go of expectations
Open your mind to the idea that your expectations aren’t always realistic or attainable for you all the time. Nothings worse for your self esteem/confidence than having a expecting something to happen in our lives that never actually occurs or is unattainable. Go into every situation and moment in life with open-mindedness, you might feel that the pressure is lifted and you may even find that you’re living in the moment more.
5. Be Grateful
Im sure that we’ve all been taught the importance of manners from a young age, but sometimes the word sorry slips out too often. We need to learn to say thank you instead of apologising when the apology isn’t necessary.
6. Hold yourself confidently
If you hold yourself confidently, chances are you’ll find that confidence and feel it in every aspect of your life. Posture plays a huge part in our confidence. Slouching in the chest area is where we hold the most stress, so simply pushing your shoulders back and chin up could have a dramatic affect on how you hold yourself in other aspects of your life too.
7. Look after yourself
It might not seem like much of a tip but treating yourself like you’re important is most likely the most valuable tip I can give you. You’re the most important person in your life, so looking after yourself should be on the very top of your priority list. Feeling good can increase our overall confidence and happiness in ourselves. Simple things like fuelling your body with nutrient dense whole foods, drinking plenty of water, getting enough sleep and looking after your skin can play a significant role in how you feel.
8. Get moving
How often have you dreaded working out but actually felt a million times better afterwards? “Exercise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy” – Elle Woods, Legally Blonde. The release of these endorphins will make you feel better almost instantaneously. Exercising also leads to long term effects such as increased strength, toning of muscle, fitness and stamina. You’ll not only feel better on the inside but also the outside too. Wouldn’t you feel more confident in yourself because of these benefits?
These aren’t set instructions or rules for you to live by, you might connect with some and others may not resonate with your personality or style of life. Find something that clicks with you, that vibes the way you do because finding confidence isn’t limited to these tips. You can seek confidence in many ways, so keep chasing it.